


The Master Sword

by forabeatofadrum (maanorchidee)



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Fluff, Let Simon Be Happy, M/M, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-14 17:00:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29299293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maanorchidee/pseuds/forabeatofadrum
Summary: Baz and Penny decide to buy a sword for Simon’s birthday.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Comments: 2
Kudos: 54





	The Master Sword

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, this silly prompt became a thing thanks to two things: 1) my newfound obsession with Breath of the Wild and 2) rereading the Renaissance Fair part of Wayward Son. It got slightly deeper and less silly than planned. It takes place after Carry On in an AU where things got better instead of worse.

**BAZ**

Simon Snow might no longer be a mage, but he is still a very talented swordsman. He’s always preferred his sword over his wand, since he claims he’s shit at spellwork.

That is false, obviously. No one had magic like Simon.

Everyone expected Snow to mourn his magic, but no one realised that he was mourning his sword as well. 

“We should get Simon a sword as a gift,” Bunce says one day. Snow is at university, but I am still at the flat. I like studying with Bunce. (Not that I’d ever tell her that. We both have huge egos already.)

I look up from my coursebook. “What?”

“A sword!” Bunce says excitedly.

“That sounds highly dangerous,” I look around. Their flat is small. Snow won’t have the space to swing a blade around. “What kind of sword? Can anything ever replace the Sword of Mages?”

“It doesn’t have to be a real sword, but a fake sword,” Bunce says, but this only confuses me.

“Please define ‘fake sword’ for me.”

“Toys!” Bunce says. She turns her laptop around. Apparently, she wasn’t studying, she was looking up toy swords. 

I can’t help myself: I snort. It’s weird to visualise. I can see Snow swinging his new blade around. This is a ridiculous idea, but Snow loves ridiculousness. 

Bunce is looking at me expectantly. The toy swords on the screen all look cheap and I see the word ‘styrofoam’ pop up in almost every ad. The alternative is plastic.

“We need to get the highest quality shit sword possible.”

At first, Bunce remains silent, but then her eyes light up. “You’re in?”

I don’t blame her for being surprised. I usually don’t do weird stuff like this. Look at us! We’re shopping for toy swords for my boyfriend.

Bunce types something. She looks a bit deflated and says: “The expensive ones are exactly that. _Expensive_.”

“Well, it’s his birthday soon.”

“Do you think he’ll like it?”

Once again, I think about Snow yielding a new sword. It will never replace the Sword of Mages, especially if it’s made out of plastic, but Snow really takes a lot of pleasure in simple things. 

A gift like this would never make me happy. Same goes for Bunce. Out of the three of us, Snow is the only who marvels over little things and useless stuff. He makes them big. He makes them useful. Bunce and I would scoff at a plastic toy sword, but he would treat it as if it’s a real thing.

This is something I love about him. 

With that in mind, I definitely think he’ll like it.

“Yes,” I answer. 

I want to make him smile. He’s been doing so well, despite everything. If a silly gift like this can make him laugh, it will be worth it. 

* * *

**PENNY**

I don’t like these 'merchandise stores'. Baz and I decided to seek out some stores in London that sell all kinds of geeky stuff. Simon thinks it’s funny that I am offended by Normals’ depiction of magic, but I find it appalling. We don’t all wear pointed hats!

(Okay, we wore boaters. Still a big difference!)

We decided that we should go out into town to ‘feel’ the swords to make sure that they’re at least of decent quality. We don’t want shitty plastic. We want quality plastic. 

As expected, the stores have many fake swords. A lot of 'fantasy' franchises have swordwielding main characters. Some are more sci-fi than others. 

Baz and I are so out of place. The person behind the counter must’ve noticed. She takes one look at our confused faces and she immediately offers to help. 

“We’re looking for a sword for a friend,” I say. 

“Price range?” the woman asks.

“We don’t care,” Baz agrees. The woman quickly gives Baz’s outfit a look. He dresses as a rich vampire stereotype, but with more floral print and a modern twist to it, aka jeans. Every thing else? Well, if I’d seen Baz more often outside Watford, I wouldn’t have doubted Simon when he told me that Baz is a vampire. One time, I even saw him holding a pocketwatch with a chain once. He had attached it to his waistcoat.

What I’m trying to say is that Baz looks rich. The woman takes one look at him and she comes back with the most expensive options in the store. We had prepared for this. Baz knows that he’ll have to pay most of it, but he’s strangely determined to get this sword. He’s even more determined about this than I am.

I think I understand, though. We just want to make Simon smile.

Baz and I take our time to feel the materials. Baz even swings some of them. He’s not as graceful as Simon, but we can’t all be perfect. 

“Is there a particular fandom you’re looking for, though?” the woman asks after we’ve tried several swords.

“A what?” Baz asks.

The woman quickly explains this whole ‘fandom’ thing. Not only are Normals making these stupid magic rip-offs, they’re also building entire communites around it! At least they think it’s fake, but I should tell my mother about it. What if one person reveals the truth? These people might believe it more than other Normals.

I shake my head. That’s for later. Now I need to focus on a sword for Simon. I will come back to this shop at another time to closely inspect all those allegedly fake wands.

“He plays a lot of video games,” I say and Baz nods. Simon has tried to rope us into it, but Baz only got annoyed and I don’t like the genre of games that he plays.

But he plays video games. I try to mentally make a list of all the games I’ve heard of. If only I could use magic to make a whiteboard appear, so that I could write down my thoughts.

“... does Mario use a sword?” Baz asks. 

Silence.

The poor woman looks lost for words. I pity her. She has to deal with us. 

“No, but -“ she then proceeds to list a couple of characters. They probably carry swords. I’m a bit disappointed by the lack of women in the list. Women should carry more swords!

That reminds me.

“Does Zelda carry a sword?” I ask. _The Legend of Zelda_ is the only series that I can remember and Zelda is a princess. Simon loves it, but I honestly never paid attention to it. 

“Uh, no, but Link does. Link is the hero of the Zelda series.”

“Then who’s Zelda?” I say, aghast. 

“The princess. Link has to save her.”

“Of course,” I grumble.

The woman gives me a sympathetic look. “If it makes you feel better, it doesn’t make Zelda weak. The latest game has Zelda trapped because she’s fighting on her own. She’s more than Link’s princess.”

That only makes me think about Agatha. I don’t see her as weak either. Magic wise? Sure. Person wise? No. 

It fits perfectly. This way, Agatha is sort of part of it too!

“Then show me Link’s sword.”

* * *

**SIMON**

There’s been some scheming for my birthday, I just know it. Penny and Baz think they’re such great liars, but I can see right through. I stopped asking though, because they don’t answer.

Also, the point of surprises is... the surprise. Penny firmly reminded me of that fact after I kept asking. Sue me, I’m curious! 

On my birthday, we have a small gathering in our flat. Penny and Baz are here, but also two uni friends, Jacob and Jia Li, have been invited. I still can’t believe I’m making friends on uni. They’re both Normals and unbeknownst to them they’ve all been helping me readjust to life as a Normal. 

They don’t know shit about the World of Mages, so I hope that Penny and Baz don’t have anything magical planned for me. 

Probably not. Penny and Baz are so paranoid about Normals finding out about the World of Mages, they’ll never risk it.

It’s a fun night. It’s the summer, so everyone’s relaxed now that finals are over. We drink cheap beer and we’ve ordered pizza. At one points, people start giving me gifts. 

It’s still relatively new to me. I never got gifts over the summer, on my birthday, in care homes. The Wellbeloves gave me gifts for Christmas, but not for my birthday. 

My two Normal friends give me little Normal trinkets. They love the fact that I am so interested in things that are normal to them. I never had a lot of Normal stuff, since I only spent the summers outside of the World of Mages, and I didn’t see a lot of stuff in those summers. Jacob knows that he can make me genuinely happy with a fancy can opener and Jia Li thinks it’s cute that I ‘still want to use CDs’.

Then, Baz puts his hand on my thigh. 

“Bunce and I have a shared gift,” he says. 

“Oh?” 

Now, I’m intruiged. Baz and Penny are two very different people.

Penny gets up to retrieve something from her room. She comes back with a large rectangular- well, I assume it’s a box. I can’t see it, since it’s wrapped in wrapping paper.

“Happy birthday, love,” Baz kisses my cheek when Penny puts the gift down in front of me. I’m so surprised and excited. What could it be? I assume I must look like a kid who’s seeing Santa at the mall. 

I tear the paper apart, which makes my friends laugh, and when I see what’s inside, I gasp.

“You got me a Master Sword?” I ask.

I didn’t realise how much I missed having a sword until I saw this one. The Sword of Mages is one of the things I don’t like to think about, but now I imagine myself just swinging it around for fun. Maybe I can find some others to spar with. Maybe I can convince Baz.

Penny nods nervously. “I hope that’s alright. We have the receipt if you don’t like it. Baz and I took a wild guess, since I remembered the title, but of course, if we’re competely wrong-”

She can’t finish her sentence, because I give her a big hug. I also wrap my invisible wings around her as I hold her closer.

“Oh, I take that as approval.”

I let go off her, but only so that I could hug Baz. 

“Unpack it, Simon!” Jia Li says enthusiastically. She doesn’t need to tell me twice. I take it out of the box. As expected, it feels nothing like a real sword, but it also doesn’t feel super fragile. Penny and Baz must’ve gone looking for it.

I swirl it around in my hand, which impresses my uni friends. They don’t know what I can do. 

This toy will never do any real damage, but this is not for battle. This is for fun.

* * *

Later that night, after my uni friends have gone home, I’m swinging my new sword. There’s more space in my bedroom than in the living room, since the living room is cluttered. I move quickly and I make swishy noises. Real blades don’t make those noises, but it’s silly and it amuses me.

It also seems to amuse Baz. He’s lying on my bed, watching me. 

“Like what you see?” I ask.

“Always,” Baz replies, “This looks... right.”

“It feels right,” I say. It really does. I truly hadn’t realised how much I missed having a sword. Of course, this is fake and I cannot magickally summon it, but it’s- Well, it’s mine. 

(Actually, it’s Link’s. He won’t mind, though.)

I only miss someone to fight with.

“Do you think there are, like, cosplay groups around London?”

Baz looks blankly at me. “I don’t know what cosplay is.”

I laugh. God, he’s so endearing when he’s confused. It doesn’t happen often, so I need to enjoy it. After a while, I do explain what I’m trying to say. 

“You’re-” Baz suddenly cuts himself off. He has a weird look on his face. I lower my sword so that I can look at him. 

“What?”

“You’re planning to go somewhere fun?” Baz says and I now recognise the look on his face. He’s shocked and surprised. And happy. And _proud_.

I take it all in. It’s quite a lot, isn’t it? At Watford, I never made friends apart from Penny and Agatha. (Does Agatha count? Did she ever befriend me or did she just tolerate me?). The only reason I am talking to my uni friends is because they were the ones to ask me to hang out and they kept including me, as if they knew I wasn’t going to break out of this shell myself.

But Watford and uni are places I was expected to go to. Now, I’m venturing out into the world.

Baz still looks incredibly wistful and I look down to my new sword. I never thought a silly, yet expensive, toy sword could do so much. I’m pretty sure that Penny and Baz also didn’t expect it. They probably knew that I was going to love it, after all, they bought it for me, but the realisation that I now think about making friends and that it excites me... it’s a lot.

I know these clubs exist. There is one at the university, actually. I see myself running around with some other geeks, swinging our swords. We can have duels. We can play video games together. 

The sword spins around in my hand. I smile. This is the best birthday gift ever.

**Author's Note:**

> Jia Li and Jacob were created on a whim but they now live in my head rent free. Let Simon have Normal friends!


End file.
